AN ELECTRIC BUZZ
A young woman takes a big step towards a life-changing event.
Open to interpretation.
I never thought this day would come. He stands silently behind me, staring questioningly at me through the mirror, as he places the jacket I was wearing on the table beside him. ‘How did I get here?’ I think to myself. No matter, I must do what needs to be done. He places a hand on my now bare shoulder and asks, ‘Are you sure you want to do this?’ I nod, he gives my shoulder a tight squeeze. Leaning forward, he whispers in my ear; his words brushing over my ears like a soft kiss- ‘You know,’ he begins, ‘Once this happens there’s no going back? It might take a while for you-’ I cut him off, briskly and shakily with a heavy- ‘I know’.
I don’t know who is to blame for what I am about to do. Perhaps it’s the fault of my friends, those who’ve done it before. It seemed to work out well for them. Or maybe, it’s because I want to give my ex-boyfriend Mulo the shock of his life, - to prove to him I’m not that ‘safe’ girl he always complained I was. ‘Oh gosh!’ I think to myself, what of my parents? Will they be disappointed? ‘No!’ I exclaim out loud, startled; he spins me around quickly looking me squarely in the eye; ‘Should we not?’ he asks warily; I take a deep breath, and remember why I am here; ‘we should… continue.’ I respond; pause. He begins.
My hands are shaking. He notices. Looking at me sincerely he wears a brave smile, he -might be nervous too. I can’t say this is a decision of impulse. Honestly, I’ve been thinking about it for months. Planning strategically and emotionally preparing myself for this very moment. The moment I become a changed woman. A new woman. Unlocked.
I did my research. Apparently, I’ll feel the ‘same’… but also ‘different’. Different in a good way though. What feels like an electric buzz, ripples through me interrupting my chaotic thoughts and I look up at him, he stills with an apologetic look in his eye and continues.
Perhaps I should have consulted my friends further before meeting with him, but I know some of them would have tried to convince me to do otherwise; and I’ve had my mind made up about this for a while now. I look up at him and smile, he’s distracted, he seems to be enjoying himself now. Oh goodness, I really have been keeping a lot from them haven’t I? He catches my eye and smiles brightly down at me, the clippers and comb still in his hands as he looks at me, appreciating his own handy work. Shifting my eyes from his, I finally truly look at myself in the mirror, I really look. My hair is short in the back with razor lines running through it. Long in the front, covering half my left eye and cheek. My first ‘big haircut’. I smile. I look beautiful.
Open to interpretation.
I never thought this day would come. He stands silently behind me, staring questioningly at me through the mirror, as he places the jacket I was wearing on the table beside him. ‘How did I get here?’ I think to myself. No matter, I must do what needs to be done. He places a hand on my now bare shoulder and asks, ‘Are you sure you want to do this?’ I nod, he gives my shoulder a tight squeeze. Leaning forward, he whispers in my ear; his words brushing over my ears like a soft kiss- ‘You know,’ he begins, ‘Once this happens there’s no going back? It might take a while for you-’ I cut him off, briskly and shakily with a heavy- ‘I know’.
I don’t know who is to blame for what I am about to do. Perhaps it’s the fault of my friends, those who’ve done it before. It seemed to work out well for them. Or maybe, it’s because I want to give my ex-boyfriend Mulo the shock of his life, - to prove to him I’m not that ‘safe’ girl he always complained I was. ‘Oh gosh!’ I think to myself, what of my parents? Will they be disappointed? ‘No!’ I exclaim out loud, startled; he spins me around quickly looking me squarely in the eye; ‘Should we not?’ he asks warily; I take a deep breath, and remember why I am here; ‘we should… continue.’ I respond; pause. He begins.
My hands are shaking. He notices. Looking at me sincerely he wears a brave smile, he -might be nervous too. I can’t say this is a decision of impulse. Honestly, I’ve been thinking about it for months. Planning strategically and emotionally preparing myself for this very moment. The moment I become a changed woman. A new woman. Unlocked.
I did my research. Apparently, I’ll feel the ‘same’… but also ‘different’. Different in a good way though. What feels like an electric buzz, ripples through me interrupting my chaotic thoughts and I look up at him, he stills with an apologetic look in his eye and continues.
Perhaps I should have consulted my friends further before meeting with him, but I know some of them would have tried to convince me to do otherwise; and I’ve had my mind made up about this for a while now. I look up at him and smile, he’s distracted, he seems to be enjoying himself now. Oh goodness, I really have been keeping a lot from them haven’t I? He catches my eye and smiles brightly down at me, the clippers and comb still in his hands as he looks at me, appreciating his own handy work. Shifting my eyes from his, I finally truly look at myself in the mirror, I really look. My hair is short in the back with razor lines running through it. Long in the front, covering half my left eye and cheek. My first ‘big haircut’. I smile. I look beautiful.
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